My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
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It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
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I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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