home. puking in laundry basket.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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