if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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