I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
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