Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
