i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
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