jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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