I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
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You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
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If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
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