I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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