Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
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