is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
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