"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Randomize
