Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I lost the right to judge tonight
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
