he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Randomize
