No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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