Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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