Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
