bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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