Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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