I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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