Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
You're like the curious george of whores
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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