im gay
i know
yea but for you.
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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