Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
