I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Randomize
