Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
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