TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Randomize