I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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