at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Actions speak louder than pants.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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