Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
