I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize