Whod you bang
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Randomize
