I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
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