White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
