her vagine was all disorganized.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
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