I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
