My first STD was from a foam party
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
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