32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
