Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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