ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
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