I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
