Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Naked Twister starts at high noon
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
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