I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
so let's talk penis.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Randomize
