we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
