he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Randomize
