Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
my poor anus
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog