Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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