if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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