i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
