Screwed.edu
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
How does it feel to date your dad?
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize