You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
